You know the feeling when you just want to say so many things cause they're all stuck inside you, like inside your mind, heart, and entire being, yet you can't really do it for some unknown reason so you feel restless and speechless at best and all you can do is stare at space, wonder how things could have been and how things will be in the days to come 'cause you know you want something and yet you're not even sure if that something wants you back and so you get confused and hanging on and you try to open it up, but you just can't cause it's hard like that so you just sing songs all day long, while realizing that things may be over even though they actually aren't; on the other hand, you just wanna stand up and run far far away until you find that peace that you've always wanted by sitting on a grassy field with trees, flowers, and mountains all around you and that perfect sky that catches your heart all throughout, but the thing is that's quite impossible especially here in Manila 'cause I dun see any grassy field here with trees, flowers, and mountains surrounding it cause if I found one long before, it would have been my secret place--you know, somewhere to go to when everything's just not right and you just wanna release all the pressure that's been bottling up inside of you and I don't understand why I'm dreaming for that dream place, but anyway, life is hard and so it is strong, and since we are in this life, we should be strong too and hard sometimes so that we won't get hurt that much even though most of the time there is no reason for people to get hurt you know, like if there is a dark side, there will always be a bright side, yet again it's always hard to see that bright side cause we tend to seek for something that would hide us from everything else and since darkness can hide us from all, we unconsciously do our best to ignore the bright side, but man what's the connection of this and I'm not making sense at all and feeling empty is not a good reason for me to be too random much because being empty means nada and nada means nothing and so how come I have words flowing out of me--words that corrupt my being sometimes, but I love words so I can't really ignore them cause they give me the power to have a lil more strength in the circumstances that I face in life, a great partner when you're in pain like you can just write it all off then you'd feel a lil bit fine and so I should stop now cause I've nothing left to say except I like you so much, please understand this confession.

[ Y u k o ]